Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
