Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
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