it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
