i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
