so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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