just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize
