I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
We smell like vodka and hangover
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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