Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
