Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
We're too hungover to prance.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Randomize
