i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Randomize
