Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize
