No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
Randomize
