Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Randomize
