Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
