can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Randomize