wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Green mimosas i think yes
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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