So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
