I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Randomize
