Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Randomize
