Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
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