Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
