my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
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