if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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