I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
