i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
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