I must be too annoying 4 u.
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up�
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
