the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
ttyl tear gas
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
