so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
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