There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
Randomize
