I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Will exercising make me less horny?
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize