Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
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