I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Randomize
