Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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