They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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