At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Verdict: uncircumcised.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
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