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you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
how does that bad decision feel?
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
