Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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