Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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