He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
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