Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
