Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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