I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
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