at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
