I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
