I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
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