Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I lost the right to judge tonight
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
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