I look better un-naked...
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
Randomize
