She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
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