I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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