I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Randomize
